A week isn't long enough!

Nick's back at the keyboard.


Here I ask to be forgiven for the bad naughty wicked things that some of us did:

  • Feed chips to the seagulls at Lyme Regis. 
  • Encourage the local youth at West Bay to leap from the quay side.
  • Ring the chapel bell.

Writing it up on this web page will assuage my guilt...


Apparently seagulls have attacked visitors, and given dogs, with small bows in their hair, a serious pecking. The locals give short gruff warnings to any tourist seen feeding them.  

The waitress serving us our cream tea explained all this to us. She added "I'm looking forward to next winter's sea bird cull. I'll be there, smashing a few eggs open!"

West Bay Youth

"Is that a camera?" a youth enquires.
"What are you doing with it?"
"Taking pictures of you lot diving off of this jetty."
"I like taking pictures."
"You don't work for the Bridport Gazette?"
"Or the Dorset News?"
"No, why do you ask?"
"We'd get in to some serious shit with our mums and dads and teachers if they knew what we're doing. This water's dangerous and it's really risky if a boat gets into the quay when there's someone in the water."
"Then I would urge you to leave this structure, and play in a safe area." I said in my 1950's public information film voice.
"Bollocks to that. Here, take my picture. I'm going to dive in. Email it to me!"

Chapel Bell

In the lounge at Wolfeton Gatehouse there is a bell rope. OK, not a bell chamber, just a rope running up the wall. It could easily be mistaken for an electrical cable. Except it's a rope. A rope with a bell on the end of it!

Above the lounge is a locked room. In the locked room is a large dusty bell, with the end of the rope tied to the striker.  

Beneath the lounge is the Captain's Private Chapel, complete with devotional sally.

Within the lounge, a gentle tug on the rope yields a wondrous "dong" from the bell above.

Five Go Mad In Dorset

Yes there was five of us in Dorset, but actually we didn't go mad. We returned home as mad as we went.

Dorset is a relaxing place, and not likely to send you mad. OK, the shops and car parks shut early, and only accountants live in Dorchester.

So here's a link to Five Go Mad In Dorset and other Comic Strip episodes.


Swiss Cottage and Wolveton Gate House are Landmark Trust properties.

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